Women in polygamous relationships

RaydaJ By RaydaJ, 10th Mar 2012 | Follow this author | RSS Feed | Short URL http://nut.bz/1iui13qf/
Posted in Wikinut>Health>General Health>Women's Health

advantages and disadvantages of women living in polygamous relationships

First wives, second wives

In Cape Town, South Africa, polygamy is alive and well and there is no stigma attached to it – not anymore. With younger women wanting to educate themselves at university and who also wants to have a husband, love, and all the things we need to be nurtured, polygamy is answering the needs of many women who want to be mothers, have careers, have family, and have a balanced and well-rounded life. To be sure, it cannot be easy when the relationship and marriage came about because of cheating, but once you understand and accept how it works, you might find yourself surprised that it can actually suit your lifestyle.

Benefits for women in polygamous relationships

• The husband takes turns spending time at the different homes and they do not have to have sex every night. Yes, not all women want it. Some women do not want to share a bed, and being in a polygamous relationship gives you off days from a husband. This is particularly appreciated by women who do not want a man around all the time. There are lots of us.

• They do not have to cook every day. They would be able to eat what they want or go out with friends for a meal.

• They have less washing and other chores to do.

• They have peace and tranquility for at least three nights a week.

• They do not have to tell their husbands where they are going.

• They can go shopping for as long as they want.

• They do not have to have a man around all the time.

• The best part is they would have a husband, plus a partner who is more a lover than a husband coming home three times a week – they have protection as well as family life as well as independence and time alone with their friends.

Disadvantages of being in a religious relationship

1 If the relationship started off with the husband having cheated in the marriage, the woman who comes into that relationship will be hated and will receive little love. The first wife will hate her, and the kids will too.

2 Even though it is wrong, the second wife will get little respect. She will be known as a home wrecker.

3 In a relationship where the first wife cannot conceive and have a child, when the second wife falls pregnant the first wife will be jealous and might even hate the child.


To be sure, polygamy is not for everyone, and for some women it will be a nightmare. If someone had to ask me twenty years ago whether I would become a second wife, I would have laughed and asked, are you kidding? Today I have different feelings about it. As a full-time writer I have little time for going out with friends and do not have much time to entertain, and am by nature a loner. Becoming a second wife for me would be a cinch. I would have all the benefits of being a single woman – and I would have a husband, and perhaps a Mercedes Benz to drive around in.

http://www.raydajacobs.blogspot.com

Tags

Bible, First Wife, Islam, Polygamy, Quran, Second Wife, Wives

Meet the author

author avatar RaydaJ
Published novelist of ten books, dozens of short stories, and hundreds of articles. Will focus on health which has many areas, and on parenting.

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Comments

author avatar Lady Aiyanna
10th Mar 2012 (#)

The culture in Africa is different and in India which has the matriarchal society in tribes it is common to see one woman with many husbands too.
None the less the problem arises when they step out of that cultural environment and take their culture and values along with them irrespective of the prevailing law of the land where they live.
It is best for them to learn what it is like when they leave their homeland rather than stepping out and messing with the whole system of the new land of residence by taking it along.

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author avatar Lady Aiyanna
10th Mar 2012 (#)

With regard to a woman as a woman - I have have my own name and reputation to uphold and would never ever stoop to such a level no matter what even if I am part of such a society. I would rather be different and become the lotus amongst the weeds than follow the above it leads to rivalry and at times even murder and deaths in real. Men like exclusive rights of their woman as they feel the trust when they are with them not in multiplicity. They can detect it not in the touch and feel but in the emotion the woman has towards them. If she is exclusive as in one on one the relationship could be stronger and withstands the test of time despite temptation from all directions.

If the above is the case, would prefer being single and am sure the men would agree with me on this too.

On a different context, I chose to be single - a married spinster (I am separated not divorced) because of a male having multiple partners and betrayal by my male best friend to cover his nefarious activities.

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author avatar Lucy
12th Feb 2013 (#)

My husband and I want to bring home a second wife but we want se advice our kids are grown, if we decide to get the second wife do we do everything together all three of us and is it ok to sleep on the same bed is ok to go out together thos way one wont feel left out

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author avatar Pliggy
19th Oct 2013 (#)

Yes! to all your questions. One bed and everyone going out together cuts down on so much jealousy, and there's nothing to be ashamed of. Be committed and true to each other.

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author avatar Brett
20th Jul 2013 (#)

I'm a single guy looking for sister wifes where do I find woman that are in to pologamy relationships I would really like a pologamy family . Kind regards :brett

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