Getting slim by never eating again

Marzeus von Hemelen By Marzeus von Hemelen, 24th Oct 2015 | Follow this author | RSS Feed
Posted in Wikinut>Health>Diet & Nutrition

So my fat brother Petros tells me today that finally he knows how to get his fatness under control.

Getting slim by never eating again

We've heard that quite a few times but he ended up being fatter every time. Once he tried running 50 kilometres in two days, thinking that all the burning of energy will do it.

Well, he couldn't walk afterwards and all the impassiveness made him even fatter.

Anyways, his greatest problem is Coca Cola is just too delicious and he must drink it every day. Can't blame him because Coca Cola really is delicious. But anyway.

Today he tells me one of his most fantastic ideas yet: He's going to stop eating for three days. Eat nothing. Zip.

According to his thinking, his body will "feed off itself".

I said no. Don't do it. He said yes. He's going to do it.

Come tomorrow, he's going to start. So I'll either have a dead brother or somebody who gets so hungry, he binges and ends up yet fatter. I think we're looking at the latter. We'll see.

Well, this is it: The first day of never eating again

Well, you might have read my previous post about my very fat brother Petros who, despite almost being 40 (or over. I can't remember), still has very immature ideas about how to get his fatness under control.

His latest bright idea was to stop eating from today onwards for at least three days, then eat a little and then not eat again for three days.

I told him it's stupid.

Still, he has a hard head.

And so, today we shall see how long he lasts. I give him until about 11am before he jumps into binging.

Day 1 of extreme fasting diet

Well, today was the first day of my fat brother Petros' new diet that didn't take away my approval one bit.

In fact, it's not a diet. He decided he'll simply stop eating for three days at a time, then eat a bit, then fast for another three days. Not sure if he was planning to continue doing it until he dies. Which would be soon, following this diet and all.

So, he started his fasting this morning.

By 12pm, he has two fruits and a cup of coffee. Not sure how that equates in his mind "not eating anything at all", but there it is.

Later this afternoon, his coffee on his empty stomache makes him feel horrid.

So, it should come as no surprize that some time after 5pm, I come into the kitchen and see Petros carrying 6 (six) hamburgers he's going to fry up for himself.

"So.... eating nothing all day then?", I ask.

He says he's feeling poorly. In fact, so poorly, he has to eat something. So he's eating like a pig, the only way he knows how.

Well, I haven't paid close attention, but I'd say he's pretty stuffed now. At least I have no more worrying about him killing himself by not eating for three days. I feel better now.

That then was my genius and fat brother's first day of eating "absolutely nothing" for weight loss.

Guy who doesn't eat anything at all, eats half a chicken

Well you might have seen a theme I've been discussing: My fat brother Petros' plan to lose weight by stopping to eat anything at all.

Fortunately I need not have feared that he would kill himself, as before one day was out, he was back to eating like a pig.

This would have been day two of his diet, and this transpired:

I put a chicken in the oven for me.

Wasn't long before he was asking me if he could have some of my chicken.

Chicken seems to always be the acceptable thing, from people who say they're vegetarian and don't eat any meat but do eat chicken, to people who say they don't eat anything at all, but eat chicken.

Point is, it seems the issue is now closed, and Mister No-Eat has become Mister I-eat-as-always.

I guess that's what fasting diets lead to: Eating.

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Tags

Fat, Fat Garbage, Fatness, Fitness, Obesity, Overweight, Slimming, Weight Loss

Meet the author

author avatar Marzeus von Hemelen
I like eggs for breakfast. I live on top of a hill inside a beautiful but old dwelling complex. I like to take life in through my senses and then give feedback through my writing.

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