Living with Cancer

Carol Roach By Carol Roach, 26th Jul 2016 | Follow this author | RSS Feed | Short URL http://nut.bz/370qewqe/
Posted in Wikinut>Health>General Health>Diseases & Infections

This article is about my personal experience with cancer. The article was previously published in BourneBlog.

You have cancer

Most people know someone who has cancer, some people have cancer; but, you never get the full impact of how that actually feels until you hear the doctor says you have cancer. I was just diagnosed with cancer in April. Prior to that I was on the mend.

On the mend

I have been overweight all my life. It got to a point that I was so fed-up with diets that I just stopped going on them. I got bigger and bigger and my health began to fail. It got to the point that I could no longer work and I had to come to the stark realization that money would be scarce from that point forward. This was back in 2005.

I struggled many years with no money and it was terrible. Of course I write, but I had to write so much as a freelance writer that I went through burnout three times. Meanwhile, I got fatter and fatter. My health deteriorated, my liver was damaged, my kidneys started to get damaged and still I ate and ate and ate. I had uncontrolled diabetes and my blood sugar shot through the roof. I could hardly move let alone walk. My doctor had suggested weight lost surgery but I was afraid of it.

As my health got worse I finally made the decision that I needed to have the surgery because I would never lose all the weight on my own. I had the surgery, I lost 113 pounds to date. My liver doctor was so happy he said to me, "You know you were five minutes away from midnight."

I was starting to feel good about myself as I began to see the changes in me. I was taking exercises classes and all was going well.

Living With Cancer

Then one day I went to clinic for a routine pap test and the nurse found I had blood inside me. She thought it might have been coming from my cervix and ordered tests. Two days later I had a full fledged period and I am post menopausal. I was afraid. I called her and I had a biopsy which revealed I have uterine cancer. In my heart I had sensed it was cancer even before I was told.

Presently, I am living in a world of uncertainty right now. I had my pre-ops and I am waiting for them to tell me when the surgery will be. I will have a hysterectomy.

The thing is no one can fully understand what someone is going through when they have cancer unless they get it themselves. It is easy to say oh you will pull through don't worry it is an easy operation. But it is not as simple as that.
The person who is afflicted with cancer is faced with knowing his or her body has been taken over by the cancer. They know they are walking around with it inside of them, eating away at them.
We wonder about the future. Will the operation get all the cancer?
We wonder if the cancer has spread and invaded other parts of our body. My doctor says he cannot answer that until he opens me up. So the fear is there until I find out for sure. Of course I wonder even if the cancer is taken care of will it come back.

It has been since April that I have known about my cancer, I am getting to understand it better, but of course it was not always that way. In the beginning no amount of reassurance could convince me that I was not about to die. My mind knew logically it was too soon to think about that; my heart had a different story to tell.

I am not one to cry and I was shocked when out of the blue I just broke down and started to cry in church. Although there were people there to comfort me I was embarrassed I did not want to make a public spectacle of myself like I did.

I don't cry anymore, but I have to talk about it. I am surprised I was not able to write about it until today because I write about my entire life. The cancer I avoided. So today is the day I am writing about it. This is a first article about my cancer.

My life will continue to be in limbo until after the operation and I find out the extent of my cancer; but, until then I just have to wait and hope for the best.

Tags

Cancer, Cancer Diagnosis, Cancer Fighting, Uterine Cancer

Meet the author

author avatar Carol Roach
Retired therapist and author of two books, freelance writer, newsletter editor, and blogger. I write, health, mental health, women's issues, animal , celebrity, history, and SEO articles.

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Comments

author avatar Nancy Czerwinski
27th Jul 2016 (#)

Carol, as always I wish you the best! I'm going to add you to my prayer list and I'm sending good thoughts your way.

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author avatar Carol Roach
30th Jul 2016 (#)

thank you so much hon

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author avatar Vicky Pino
27th Jul 2016 (#)

I'm really for you, Carol. My sister was diagnosed with colon cancer. Fortunately, it was on a very early stage. Yet, she had her chemo therapy sessions and radiation. At the moment, all seems clear, but she hasn't been discarded from hospital. What I think about so many suffering from a variety of cancers even at a young age it's the food we eat, which is poisoned by those who have destroyed traditional farming to promote their criminal agro business. If yours is still on an early stage, try to find natural ways to cure it even if you still have to undergo chemo and radiation. I tell you many doctors wouldn't accept going into chemo and radiation if they suffered cancer, because they know that this won't cure 100% and they're aggresive treatments for the body.

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author avatar Carol Roach
30th Jul 2016 (#)

thank you hon, I am really trying to change the way I eat, I had weight loss surgery last year and I don't eat as much or the same anymore. I wish your sister the best

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author avatar Lady Aiyanna
27th Jul 2016 (#)

Sorry to hear of your cancer. None the less, two of my friends are dying of cancer. One just found more lumps in her breasts and the other did a medical check for a laugh just for her offspring and discovered just two days ago that she was with terminal cancer and it had taken over ALL her internal organs and started at the rectum.
Well at least you have hope, she just has no hope at all but none the less, the one with breast cancer is responding to chemo.

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author avatar Lady Aiyanna
27th Jul 2016 (#)

BTW??? Is Montreal not equipped with blood tests and MRI's to get all the results??? Its costs under $200 to get one done.

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author avatar Carol Roach
30th Jul 2016 (#)

I wish her the best, of course Montreal is equipped, I get my MRI on Wednesday it is the last test to do. It cost nothing

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author avatar Lady Aiyanna
27th Jul 2016 (#)

Forgot you are cash strapped and have to sell candle wicks and tarts for charity fund donations but am sure you have health insurance and pray that all is well.... A Scan should get you the results along with urine and stool checks alongside.

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author avatar Carol Roach
30th Jul 2016 (#)

I have had all the test except the MRI and I will have that on Wednesday. I do not sell candles I never did.

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author avatar Stella Mitchell
28th Jul 2016 (#)

dear Carol...
I pray that our Lord and Saviour , Jesus Christ , will touch your mind, body , soul and spirit , and give you His peace so you will know His Love, Mercy , Forgiveness and Healing power minister to you in this trying hour .
He knows the plans He has for you , which are for good , and not evil , to give you a hope and a future Jer 29v11....so trust in Him and Do Not Fear .
He loves you and will see you through .
God bless you
Stella ><

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author avatar Carol Roach
30th Jul 2016 (#)

thank you very much

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author avatar writestuff
30th Jul 2016 (#)

Dear Carol
Thanks for sharing. Please know I will keep you in my thoughts and that
I see thee whole!

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author avatar Carol Roach
31st Jul 2016 (#)

thank you so much writestuff

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author avatar simplyoj
6th Aug 2016 (#)

Hi Carol, it's been quite a while that I have not been active here. I just read about your post, and yes you are right, not all can understand what you are going through when you are sick until you have experienced it. I just remember when I was hospitalized. I guess, it does not matter now how long will your life will be here. You would always wonder if the cancer will go back, or where your life will lead you. Life have lots of uncertainties. The most important thing is you have accepted and ready to face the chalelnges. By writing this post, you are inspiring other cancer patients and others who have illness. I hope you will be able to live each day to the fullest! My prayers with you always.

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author avatar Sean_Victorydawn
12th Sep 2016 (#)

Hi Carol, I follow your pages for we have interest and experience in similar subjects and topics with you. Please read carefully and take this as a truthful and a courageous advice as anybody who knows me, knows me by means of my clarifying ability of things many people overlook. There are two ways of living: First, Living in Empyreans - Living Through Eternal Light - Living Eternal, second Living in Dark - Living Through Hades - Living As Undead which means you are already dead as you are living. Continued on and First, things that's everything is made of and everything is being carried through is chemically made, and mostly usable in form of plastics. Those are the widest range of life sources you can think of: Where the water is coming from, how it's distributed, and the plastic coverage around everything we eat,drink,digest,breath,change serum they are deadly poisonous plastics: Plastics is a Hellbound Inhumane Weapon. Second, there are 4 forces on Earth and Heavens: Water,Soil,Fire,Air; and there are no other forces on Earth and Heavens. On the contrary, there are 4 forces on Hades and Hell, scientifically proven in BC.3600 : Magnetism, Smoke, Dust, Ice. On the above of everything there is Light. And on the bottom of everything there is Darkness. Now let's make yourself a chart, one simple thing, you can understand for yourself: One side of this chart draw 4 columns of Earth forces, horizontally next to this chart draw 4 columns of Hades forces, above this two chart draw the Light, way below at the very bottom let's the draw the Dark. When you are looking to what I am looking at right now, you will also see the Cross through this chart "t" shape. And from now on it's easy to figure the forms of Hades: 1-Electricity through light bulbs is the number cause of cancer(don't use electricity at all for nothing, use candle light, for candle is the force of light+fire+soil) 2-Smoke forms of everything, even the clouds in the air, even the combustion smoke of a tiny match. 3-Ice and things that are frozen and melted and then get in contact with Human spirit or body causes Death; for Ice is Inhumane and Ungodly. Never freeze anything, never touch anything that is melted from ice, because this is the very gate to Hades. 4-Gravity: Gravitational forces on Earth is the main calculator how sooner a creature that has one thousand years of life cycle will die. The variation of the gravity destroys human metabolism, when we are travelling in an airplane it's not only our ears that are alarming, it's the entire soul and body noticing that life cycle is being shorted. There are plenty of Bible references that tells Human life on Earth is 1000 years. One thousand. And dying after 1000 years is in the from "soiling" just like how a tree withers. A young body that dies, is not a Godly dying, it's a killing of Human ways. A body that is not aged 1000 years on Earth is a young body. The truth is yet to be revealed.

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author avatar spirited
10th Oct 2016 (#)

I have not been around Wikinut much lately.

Sorry you went through all of this.

I guess nobody really ever knows anything much about what another person is going through.

Thanks for sharing your journey here.

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author avatar Retired
29th Jul 2018 (#)

Interesting post Carol

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